See Nat Run

Shamrock Marathon Part 2: In the howling wind...

Honestly, I was very impressed with my time at the half but the wind picked up. Rachel and I thoughed it out for many miles. We were joined by Julie who was running her first event ever. (Is it just me or is it a bit odd to have your very first event be a marathon?) Julie would join us for a bit. Her running partner decided to run her own race and was miles ahead. Poor Julie was having a hard run. (As would I later on. She just took it slow and finished a few minutes after I did. That is determination.)

So to mile 17 Rachel and I slogged it out. Then I had to pee. Again. (Time #2.) Rachel went ahead -- I never did catch up. (All this before we could exchange email addresses or blog names. Alas. If anyone knows her send her my way.) Tell her thank you for a good five miles. (I would need to go again at mile 22. Don't ask. I had to pee a lot. It's odd. Last marathon I went once. And then only because I figured I should.)

Along the way, we ran by the first batch of marathoners finishing up including Amy Palmiero-Winter. (Amazing!) And some of the the half marathoners. Hard run when you're surrounded by elites.

We hit the pirates water station who fed us CarbBooms. (Strawberry.) Then we hit the interminable road from hell. It a tree lined high way. Went on for miles and miles and miles. (There has got to be a nicer less boring course than this.) Thank god Rachel was there. Seems it was just the three of us along this road (I know there were other runners. In my head there aren't.) My fuel levels were all over the map. I decide to walk a full six minute cycle and eat a granola bar. Helped a bit. To "entertain us" along the way they had funny sign posts. Rachel and I tried to memorize some.

"If Milly Vanilly falls in the forest..."
(a few feet later)
"Does someone else make a sound?" (That dates me doesn't it?)

"Man with hand in pocket feels cocky all day."
It's the dumb stuff.

I somehow managed to coast until mile 20 (all alone Rachel left my bladder and I behind.) Then I just lost it. It was 4h30 in. (I beat my training time for this distance which was well over 5 hours). It's the fact that I had another 10K to go that killed me. And here I was in the middle of freaking nowhere not a course organizer in sight. (There was one about 100 yards ahead.) Complete mental breakdown. There was a guy barfing in the bushes getting help from someone military. All I wanted to do was to stop moving, sit somewhere nice and have a diet coke and a sandwich. But there is 6.2 miles to go, well there is just no other way out of this except to finish. Because I didn't come 700 miles to get a DNF.AND my last training run was in a blizzard. A huge freaking blizzard. This is just like that. So suck it you pansy-ass.

Some DJ was playing Lose Yourself, again. "It's all downhill from here," he said with a chuckle. From the bottom of a hill, 21 miles into a marathon. I am not homicidal most of the time. But I wanted to kill him. Tosser. I am Canadian in the U.S., I reckon they'd call me an enemy of the state and send me to Guantanamo for some water torture.

I found this course of thought amusing And it kept me going until we got to the final stretch. By kept me going I mean it kept me walking. "Ok Nat... it's like Chloe said Lance said "Pain will go away once you cross the finish line. Quitting is forever. Now if you get 23 miles, you'll find civilization again. And all will be ok. You can definitely walk 6.2 in 90 minutes." Here is the thing. It wasn't the pain, it was the fatigue. Mental fatigue. I was just tired of the course, tired of the boring course from hell. And I was just tired. And I wanted to stop.

"Nat, you can't quit because nothing really hurts. The guys didn't drive 12 hours NOT to see you finish. Are you going to die? no. What would make things better? Beer. A joint. Diet coke."

(A lot of conversations with runners that go like this. They: "How's it going?" Me: "Meh. Ok. You?" They:"Ok. I think it's ok to feel that way right now." Deep stuff at the wall end of a marathon.) Longest three miles of my life.

In retrospect I should have plugged in the Shuffle and pounded out the last 6. It would have helped. Except i didn't even have it in me to dig it out. (I don't want to listen to ANYTHING. You know I'm really low when that happens.)

But I soldier on, I get to the water station with the pirates at 23 miles. I know I can crawl three miles before the cut off. I am going to finish. Time to party. So what if it took 6 hours.

The volunteer shouts. "Beer!"
I stop. "Vodka?" (thinking she's kidding.)
"No vodka. But you can have beer if you want it."
"Awesome." (I laugh, thank her for playing along.)

I don't even look take a big gulp. Holy fuck. It's really beer. I look at the guy with the water... "It was really beer," I laughed. He did not seem to find this nearly as amusing. This made life a lot better. I kept me going for a bit. We were going to make it. This is where I meet Janice. At this point we are both tired. And she is walking fast. I decide I will try to keep up with the fast walker. Then she says "You know what I am wondering at this point? I am wondering why I decided to do this, seems to be the half is so much more reasonable." Agreed.

But I was going to finish a marathon, and well the cloud in my mind lifted. I was going to finish this thing.

Then I "dance a little dance and got down tonight" with a volunteer. I sprinted to the end. All smiles, and I am so happy that I got through it. The most beautiful man I have ever seen gave me my medal (they actually put it around your neck Olympic style) and then they wrap you in an oh-so cool metallic blanket, and hand you a finishers cap. (Love those.) Then I felt like a marathoner! Instantly I wanted to do it again. (And I will once my quads forgive me.)

Which leads me to my main criticism for this event. There were by my estimation at least 200 participants behind me (not including the walkers) and there was NO FOOD save the small bag pretzel, a single shortbread cookie and the granola bar in our kits. Not sure about you but I expect at least a banana and a bagel. Then onto to the finishers tent looking for food where I was handed 5 beer tickets. Isn't just a recipe for catastrophe here folks? So I got a beer (they had cool green cups) had two quick sips. Looked for food which didn't exist. Dumped the beer from that cup (which is what I wanted anyway.)

We had left over Krispy Cremes in the hotel. I handed my four unused beer tickets to some runner who was more than happy to take them. The Man went to get me pizza. I ate three donuts (I LOVE DONUTS) while I was waiting. Life is good when these two monkeys are around you know? I am one lucky lucky lucky woman. These guys are too good to me.

I need to thank every one who sent me well wishes and congratulations. I was really touched by ever single comment. I am one lucky lady. Thank you for all the encouragement over the last 20 weeks. I need to find a new challenge. This is this week's goal. Not much running wise (ANGRY quads) just a think.

Shamrock: Part 1 -- The answer is blowing in the wind

Shamrock Marathon: 26.2 miles (26.4 if you include the pee breaks -- 26.98 if you include the walk back to the hotel.)
Weather: 8C/46.4F and windy. Really really really windy.
Time: 5h58 (chip time). Garmin time 5:52 (I stopped it during pee breaks.)
Time at the half: 2H45 (Garmin time.)

I did it. I really really did it. I ran marathon #2. I got it done. Hell yeah! Twenty weeks ago, I embarked on a training plan. And I stuck to it. And I got it done. The gargoyle has a new medal -- I think I may wear it to work tomorrow. I wonder what goes with green? I'm still beaming. (The non-athlete part of me is smiling at the concept... so you, the artsy wouldn't sign up for sports ran TWO marathons! Not just one! Two.)

I fucking did it. I ran a marathon!!! And I did not die, give up. And I just may do that again. In 2009.

It was cold (for Virginia Beach) and windy. Very windy. The course is a loop, out to the National Guard Training base at one end, then back to the board walk then out to some other sort of installation (I think it may be a state park.) The course is quite uninspired. Nothing much to look at, and the crowds were for the most part very thin but the weather sucked.

Pre-race, I talked to a gorgeous blond from North Carolina who was running her first event ever. She ran it to get rid of her "baby fat" after baby number 3, who is 9 months old. (She started running shortly after her second now 18 months old.) Amazing. I would meet three people who were running this as their first ever event. I also chatted with one guy who looked might familiar. He and his friend (who also looked very familiar) were aiming to run at 4h30 marathon. They were both trying to get faster to train for Boston. We chatted for a bit. Good bit of advice here, as you increase speed you have to make sure that it's still fun.

God Bless America (someone needs to explain when they play the Star Spangled Banner vs. God Bless America), then we were off. I was making really good time to the half. I kept saying to myself slow down... slow down. Manage to let the excitement keep me going.

Our bibs had our names on them. (I acutally really really like this.) So the volunteers would be there with a kind word. It screwed me up every time. How do they know? Hats off to the volunteers. Seven hours in the wind is not fun. I hate wind. Did I mention that?

I leap frogged with Latesha between miles 5 to 7. She was running for childhood leukemia and told me how much money her group had raised and how excited she was by it all. It was also her first event. She talked about the coaching. I shared with her what advice I had. (Umm.. have fun, take it slow.) She was lovely. She cought up to me (after potty break #1) --"Natalie, you are going to rock this thing girl." I toyed with just running with her. But I decide to just do my own thing. Needing to pee would ruin many running friendships.

Near mile 9 The National Guard Base, the platoons came out to cheer us on and try to out-do each other. The wall of extended hands. The girls had a little cheer going on for us. "It's too easy." Loved it. I just wish we'd had this near the end of the course. (i.e. had the run the course in the other direction.) Julie, who we will meet in Part 2, was getting "encouragement" from her coach friend.

Fighter planes zoomed (man those things are loud) passed me near the turn around at mile 10. Four of them. Yes. I stopped to looked. It was that or the rows of hotels in front of me. Then on to the Boardwalk. I was making fabulous time. And I felt great. And I was almost half way. Life was great and it was looking like a stellar run. I am a goddess. This rocks.

Then a mile down the boardwalk. Fuck me. The wind. The goddamn wind. I'd see the route. another 7 miles in this direction. In the goddamn wind. Oh my god. How I am going to do this? This is where I met Rachel from Baltimore. She's a social worker and we talked politics, and life and basically kept each other going until I had to pee. Again at mile 17 (or there about.) But I needed her on the board walk and there she was.

The Man snapped this picture. He joked that he wasn't sure I would see him because I would be too busy meeting people. After the wind on the board walk, I was elated to see a friendly face and a "Hi Mom, from my little boy." This kept me going to at least the half. They came out ... in the cold to see me.

Mind you, they did drive 700 miles to get me there and will drive another 700 to get me home. So I should be surprised. If there anyone deserves massive kudos for getting my through this it's those two. The Saturday long runs, picking up the slack for me. I am one truly lucky lady. I love them both so much. It's not easy living with me during training. These thoughts carried my to the half...

onto the drama of the second half.

Part 2 -- tomorrow. The Wall. Janice. The end.

Holy ckuf! The marathon is tomorrow.

Weather in Ottawa: -4C /25F
Weather in Virginia Beach: 13C

THE MARATHON IS TOMORROW.

Total distance traveled since last post: 600 miles
Total distance covered on foot since the beginning of training: 359 miles

I made it to Virginia Beach and I am full of pre-race jitters. I picked up my race kit last night. First thing we did after checking out the hotel.

News is:
I have a chip. I have a race shirt (nice freaking shirt too, I'll post a photo post race. I bought cheap running shoes at the expo. (I am pretty sure the Brooks people think I am insane.) "Are you sure they haven't changed anything but the colour?"

There is snow in fact, there are leaves on the trees. I feel good although my food choices have not been stellar. We are going to check out the aquarium in lieu of my stay loose run. And some hip stretches. (My lower back is a bit tight.)

In other news, the rules say no iPod or earphones. "For safety" -- whatever. Now I did the half in Philly with no earphones. Gah. I may sneak in my shuffle for the last long miles. Definitely bringing my camera though. Looks like the loop is a figure 8 that starts and ends near our hotel. I am feeling good and strong and completely scared to death. Totally excited. But physically, I am in a better spot than I have been for any of my other halves.

Repeating my little mediation
Inhale/Smile/Exhale
This is a beautiful moment.

Does any one else look at all the stuff from the expo and think ... man I'd like to run there. Thinking Texas, or Arizona... or maybe California!!!

Again... a huge huge huge thanks to every one for your support and well wishes. It means so much to me. More tomorrow.

Sweat puddles and other non-sequitors

Distance: 8.16 miles
Time: 2h05
Time of last weeks 9-miles: 2h04
Temperature: -19C/-2.2 F

This run just seem to go on and on and on. And it was only 8 miles. It was as if I just couldn't bring it. Really there is no good reason for the run to suck much. None. It was just one of those things. I guess the mileage is catching up to me. Ms. M don't talk during the week but were marveling at what you know about the people you run with. As G. said two weeks ago, "you know, we should do something that involves not being sweaty and out of breath."

I am amazed at how much the body changes during the marathon training. You slowly melt away. Physically I am fine, just really really tired in a body aching kind of way. This week I plan to do more stretching, more sleeping (ha!) and just be a bit nicer to myself. It may be time to retire the high-heels for a while. But then again if Katie Holmes can walk in them after her marathon, then why can't I? (And if I was going to fake a marathon I'd fake a Boston qualifier, however the bra thing is a compelling argument... that's all I'm saying.) I just wish it wasn't so much work to stay marathon skinny.

It's officially a month until the marathon. The problem I see is that it's going to be a bit on the warm side. Not Chicago 2007 warm. But compared to what I've been training in, it's going to seem tropical. They say 50-60F (10 to 15C) is typical for that time of year but can be warmer (ack) and can be colder (ack ack). So I am trying to remember what I wear for that weather. Then I will assess if I can though out 26 miles in said gear or if I should go shopping. Or whether I should just go shopping anyway. I am going to try the drymax socks on the long run and see if they make a difference. They felt good today.

The planning has begun for the 20 miler next week. I am thinking two 10 mile loops with a pit stop at home to replenish supplies. (I think the lovely Ms. M may join me for part of the run -- which will break the tedium.)

There's still time to escape

Workout: Grocery shopping
Song of the workout: Keep the Car Running, Arcade Fire

I jest. Today is a rest day. I figure grocery shopping on Sunday is up there with hockey as a full contact sport. Sort of a mix of the Demolition Derby meets UFC.

But I have running on the mind. I booked our hotel room for Shamrock. This is contributing to the massive case of self-doubt that I'm having right now. The deal is not so much the distance. I know I can do the distance, I've done it before. My issue is recovery. I am afraid that I'll be looking at a six month recovery where I can't do anything, and it hurts. (I am a big big wuss.) That was yesterday. Now while past behaviour is indicative of future behaviour, I am in much better shape this time. So I took a moment.

Inhale. Smile. This is a beautiful moment. Exhale.

Today I woke feeling pretty good. In fact, had the schedule called for a 3-4 miles I would have done them. And I did 14 miles yesterday. This is a good sign. Last time, I had a lot less race experience under my belt. At this stage of the game, every run was hell. (Given I went from not running at all to doing a marathon in seven months. In retrospect, it was dumb.) Today, I have the base to build on. I am much stronger physically, and understand the way I run. Knock on wood the knees are holding up. I know I can do this because I have done it before. This time I won't have unnecessary pressure hanging over me. This time, I am going to run it for me. And I will love it, and I will soak it in. And on March 16 -- I will finish smiling.

Now if you all could arrange for a snow bank at the finish line we'll be all set.

Now I remember...

I rememebr when I first started running and my trainer said to me, "Nat, on rest days you rest. If you really MUST do something, no more than easy yoga." At the time I thought her completely and totally daft. I mean sitting on the couch was my forté for decades. I am REALLY good at that. Sure enough marathon training started and the rest days came and I wanted to go out and run.

But of late, the summer training was so hard and it was all I could do to get my ass in my shorts and on the trail for a 5K. I loved the rest days. So when I read John Bingham and Jenny Hadfield's  Marathoning for Mortals and they said, "Rest on your rest days." I laughed "Hahahah... I like to rest. I like to do not exercise. I am gonig to love Rest days." At this point the litle voice tried to pipe up and was promptly hushed.  I like to rest.

Today is a rest day. Today I want to run. Today I want to work my muscles. Today I want to go out, and feel like I am moving. Today, I know officially that I am in marathon mode. Instead today, I have to chant to myself about healing and the power of recovery.

*******************

I am doing some sort of keep fit in November challenge over at Weight of my World call NaMoLoMO, which is in addition to the NaMoBlo (National Month of Blogging). So over the next month I vow to:

1. Blog every day. (Now I may be over at the main blog  but I will endeavour to update both -- even if I ended up dooced for bloggin at work.

2. Sticking to my marathon plan and adding yoga and a weight training perspective

3. Stick to WW points. Tips the scale to the other side of 180 by the end of November. (Weight this morning 184.)

Open up your eyes

Run: 3.5 miles
Course: A new one, up the Hill into the farm then back down the other.
Goal: Enjoy the weather for 30 minutes
Elapsed Time: 45 minutes
Grin: From ear to ear
Favourite song: Garden, Pearl Jam (perfect for a cool down as the sun was setting)
Motivation song: Body Rock, Moby

Monique walked into my office with a weather report. "Nat, it's gorgeous. I am going to run tonight. You're still running right?" I told her about Shamrock. "You need to go out tonight, it's perfect." Truth be told I was planning to totally slack off until marathon training starts but as I was taking the walk to my car, I decided that she was absolutely right.

So I got home, ushered The Man and The Boy off to Jui jitsu and snuck out. (It wasn't really much sneaking given that I was wearing my very comfy but ugly running shorts and a tech top.) I wasn't too sure where I was heading but decided I need a little hill, up to the farm where the sun was setting over the corn field and the leaves are golden and fiery... and damn it. Isn't this just the bees knees. The quick 30, turned into 45.

After a week of people doing silly things, I realize I need to run more and more. The job is stressful. The run makes me at once move, while forcing my mind to still. This isn't about the demands, and the pressure. This is about the sun, the leaves, the corn field, the cows, outside and how all this goes on whether I am here or not. Whether I make the deadines or not. The run is mindfulness. There is just here and now when I run. No deadlines. No pressure. It is where I find the True Me. The mind needs the run to rest.

This evening, running along the paths, it was obvious -- there was really nowhere else to be.