In these last few hours of my 37th year, I sit here and think about life. I've been sitting in this spot for the last few hours, and my active mind was being amused and confused by Speed Racer.* While my subconscious worked out a fix for my bruised ego.
Sad when the old ego takes a beating. I try to keep her in check. She gets the better of me, then anger tries to take over. Totally ugly. Work brings out the worst in me. Been hard few days.
The girls shouldn't have been let loose. There they were, reasserted control. Sort of. But ego is bruised. Big picture is to remember what I control. I control the breath. Just think about the rocks.
Tonight was a healing. Pizza, the movie, snuggling and quiet reflection. Just go back to the rocks.
I snuggled up with The Boy. Happy he still likes his night time decompress with his mom. We did the family thing. Life is good. He told me he loves me. The Man and I having seen too many Hollywood films where kids die not knowing they were loved.
The Man is excited about the present he got me. Said it's the "present you didn't know you wanted" --- so that rules out Pearl Jam, Bruce Springsteen, and a trip back to Newfoundland since I know I wanted all that. I pride myself on knowing what I want. Pride... maybe that's the lesson this week. Too much pride. Curiosity.
In my office today, three of us were talking about nothing in particular. It was Jewel's break and the Philosophy Major stopped by for advice on girls. Odd thing is we all share a birthday. (Biologically old enough to be PM's mom. Ack. Old.) Good people. Jewel and I had such a hoot last night.
This weekend is going to be fun... I'm running half-marathon number 9, going to have some cake, maybe eat some not so good food. Rest. Run. And be merry.
Meanwhile I am going to think happily on the year that was.
______
*The film features Susan Sarandon possibly one of my favourite actresses of all time. I want to be Susan Sarandon when I grow up. Supposed it's too late since she's already who she is. Also a silly thing to say given the nature of this post.
Sad when the old ego takes a beating. I try to keep her in check. She gets the better of me, then anger tries to take over. Totally ugly. Work brings out the worst in me. Been hard few days.
The girls shouldn't have been let loose. There they were, reasserted control. Sort of. But ego is bruised. Big picture is to remember what I control. I control the breath. Just think about the rocks.
Tonight was a healing. Pizza, the movie, snuggling and quiet reflection. Just go back to the rocks.
I snuggled up with The Boy. Happy he still likes his night time decompress with his mom. We did the family thing. Life is good. He told me he loves me. The Man and I having seen too many Hollywood films where kids die not knowing they were loved.
The Man is excited about the present he got me. Said it's the "present you didn't know you wanted" --- so that rules out Pearl Jam, Bruce Springsteen, and a trip back to Newfoundland since I know I wanted all that. I pride myself on knowing what I want. Pride... maybe that's the lesson this week. Too much pride. Curiosity.
In my office today, three of us were talking about nothing in particular. It was Jewel's break and the Philosophy Major stopped by for advice on girls. Odd thing is we all share a birthday. (Biologically old enough to be PM's mom. Ack. Old.) Good people. Jewel and I had such a hoot last night.
This weekend is going to be fun... I'm running half-marathon number 9, going to have some cake, maybe eat some not so good food. Rest. Run. And be merry.
Meanwhile I am going to think happily on the year that was.
______
*The film features Susan Sarandon possibly one of my favourite actresses of all time. I want to be Susan Sarandon when I grow up. Supposed it's too late since she's already who she is. Also a silly thing to say given the nature of this post.
I think we all want to be Susan Sarandon when we grow up. I mean she made the top 5 of VH1's sexiest people over 40. But I'm not going to watch "Speed Racer." Too many memories from watching the animated show as a kid.
And am I mistaken? It's your birthday season? If so, have a fantastic season!
Posted by: Dagny | September 20, 2008 at 12:23 AM
Happy happy birthday! By the time you read this it will be your actual birthday and you'll have your mystery gift from The Man - how exciting!
Have a wonderful day :o)
Posted by: Penelope | September 20, 2008 at 03:02 AM
Wishing you a very Happy Birthday. It's nice to contemplate the year that was. Hope you have a wonderful time!
Posted by: Selma | September 20, 2008 at 06:55 AM
I wish you the happiest of birthdays. It sounds like 38 is going to be a year of more balance, more gratitude, more love and everything important in life.
P.S. Having a celebrity wannabe in life is important, too, you know! Mine is either Paris Hilton or Pamela Anderson.
Just kidding!!!!! Actually, I want to look like Kate Hudson but have the career of Nora Ephron.
Posted by: Mayberry Magpie | September 20, 2008 at 10:50 AM
Happy Birthday, Nat. All the really, really good years are still ahead. Can't wait to see what the mystery gift is.
Posted by: XUP | September 20, 2008 at 02:58 PM
Happy Birthday!
Posted by: sizzle | September 20, 2008 at 03:41 PM
Happy birfday Nat!
Posted by: Richgold | September 21, 2008 at 09:28 AM
Happy B-day! (late to the game) You are the cutest Mom I *heart* it. I hope to have the same type of relationship with the chicken mcnuggets (although I'm not sure this will be possible with all the hormones, PMS, and whatever other nonsense :P) that you and the kiddo have.
Posted by: Marcy | September 21, 2008 at 05:51 PM
Happy Birthday, Nat!
Posted by: Winter | September 22, 2008 at 10:18 PM
I do apologize. Happy belated birthday. A half marathon you say? Good for you. Seriously. I've wanted to run a half marathon for *years* but have never taken the time to actually, you know, do it.
Posted by: Kevin Spencer | September 23, 2008 at 11:49 PM
I missed it! Sorry... Happy Birthday Nat!
Posted by: sue | September 24, 2008 at 12:09 PM